Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Search For It ...

Just what am I searching for? I am searching for the place where the world is just wonderful. You know, where I can acknowledge full-heartedly: “WWW” - Wednesday's Wonderful World. I am searching for peace and comfort in the midst of trials and confusion.
I am here in the States for a visit only – many of you know my home is in Santa Rosa, Honduras. I love life anywhere so, I love my life in S R however, we have grown children stateside and I am so happy to be with and look forward to time with each of them and of course, our grand-babies.
I wasn't going to come this time – just Jake – and then, hubby issued the offer. When I countered it he assured me that 'it' would all work out. And of course, I will make the time count by sharing our ministry with others and spending valuable time with loved ones and be busy 'taking care of business' that always has a way of needing to be done.
So, today when my heart should be light and carefree, I am instead grieving the loss of my brother-in-law, Wendall. He left this earth on Monday and since then there has been a flurry of emotions and actions to accommodate this time. The biggest issue is that I left Lowell in S R in the middle of a slew of activities for the team and church family. Also, is the lack of funds to send one more of us stateside. Our precious Wendall wanted a 'no fuss' ending to his unpretentious life. He left strict instructions of what to do and not do and with that in mind, and the encouragement of family and even the funeral home folks (some of who are kin) it has been decided that Lowell not come 'home'. If circumstances were different he would be here in a heartbeat but they are what they are.
Jessi and I will head toward family probably tomorrow – just to “be” and help in the moments of closure to a life.
I said “unpretentious” and pretty much what I meant was that Wendall was a quiet, unassuming, gentle soul. He was a good brother-in-law. I felt loved and respected when I was with him. He was a good uncle too. He always had a way of making the kids laugh or at least smile really big. One of my favorite times to remember is my summer visiting times with him – he loved gardening and we'd walk around the ever-present summer garden and we'd talk 'garden talk' – bugs, rain or lack of, when to plant, the harvest ... or we'd be in the house and talk cooking-garden-vegies talk. I'd always get hungry! Oh, but Wendall could discuss a lot more than gardening. He was a storehouse of memories for the family – childhood stories for all 5 kids were shared and not just of them but cousins, uncles, aunts, his Dad and Mother, and the grandparents. Wendall remembered lots of good times! He was a storyteller. And he was a reader … always, always reading.
Wendall was also a battered soul. He was a Viet Nam vet and his bruised and beat-up heart never fully recouped from those tragic, horrible moments in his life.
I am glad it has worked out that I am here now, at this time. I wish Lowell could be here but know it is alright that he's not. I will treasure the moments of hugging those others who knew and loved Wendall well. And we will respect his wishes.
All in all, my world on this Wednesday is pretty wonderful – you see, I am here, sitting with my beautiful daughter nearby. I have been able to talk with family via the phone numerous times throughout the past few days. I am healthy, I am loved, I am blessed to be the Father's daughter, and I am wife of a wonderful, godly man. I am blessed with oodles of people praying on behalf of our family. I am blessed with the assurance of the words of Jesus:
 9 “So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 10 For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.   Luke 11

No, life isn't perfect today but it never, ever is.

Life is just what it is: life. 
She's filled with seasons that forever come and go – I wouldn't have it any other way. 

Ecclesiastes 3  A Time for Everything

 1 There is a time for everything,
   and a season for every activity under the heavens:

 2 a time to be born and a time to die,
   a time to plant and a time to uproot,
 3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
   a time to tear down and a time to build,
 4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
   a time to mourn and a time to dance,
 5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
   a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
 6 a time to search and a time to give up,
   a time to keep and a time to throw away,
 7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
   a time to be silent and a time to speak,
 8 a time to love and a time to hate,
   a time for war and a time for peace. 


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